「 GrayScale 」

What I'm Wearing
-I Love Ugly White Collarless longline Shirt
-Industrie Shredded Black Shorts
-Burberry Gun Metal Watch
-Reebok Classic White High Top Kicks

Zenosyne: The sense that time is going faster. 

It's actually just after your born that life flashes before your eyes - entire eons lived in those first few moments. As a kid you run around so fast, the world around you seems to stand still. A summer vacation can stretch on for an eternity. With each birthday we circle back and cross the same point around the sun. We wish each other 'many happy returns.' But soon you feel the circle begin to tighten, and you realize it's a spiral, and you're already halfway through.

When we are young and first come out into the adult world, we can meet those often a lot older than us, and we are dumbfounded at anyone who's default state of mind of cynicism and jadedness. But that is because we are our black and white selves then. We begin to lose our black and white selves more and more after being caught up, again and again, waist deep in the quagmire I call the struggles of the human condition. 

If you are unfortunate enough to have history repeat itself, the black and white in us starts to diffuse into one another. Each and every time, the polarities which we once allow in our lives, whether good or bad, come a little closer to the centre, until the adventures we were once brave enough to go after are left in a a murky halfway space that I call the inbetween grey. 

I found myself at a weird cross road recently - one that I think we all face. I noticed a recurring pattern in my life - this was the repeated pushing away of good people in my life. So scared of the black, that I was never willing to try open myself to the white in my life. So scared of the bad people I had encountered that I was never willing to give the good a chance. 

But I have also become gravely more aware of mortality each and every day. And then I missed how brave I used to be. I felt the circle tightening, finding myself wanting to come back around again. I was becoming the very image of who we did not want to be when we first came out into the world. 

Wongfu once said that "death was not what saddened us the most, but the fact that we had never felt like we had fallen in love. We would never ever have had those emotions of being hurt and being held. Teaching us that one of the greatest gifts we have in a being alive is give, receive and even lose love. What a waste, why waste this life not loving?" And I expect to see none in your in the grayscale, not now, and not years from now ...


Checkout the Dictionary of Obscure Sorrow's visual representation of Zenosyne below. I am always speechless and shook after watching this:

Archetype // 戀愛


Not a professional shoot
But sometimes when you're young and in love
The best memories only need to be like old daguerreotypes
That tell the stories only the two of you will remember
Like walking through museums for hours ...

It is the law of our lives. It is the one of the most ubiquitous and other worldly forces in our universe ... that also resides inside of all us. It is the compass by which any moment becomes the apex of your life, or can render the very same moment the greatest south. Here are the archetypes of how love manifested in my life. All based off true stories:

You mean more to me now,
The more that I think 
And plan to be without you, 

Found myself the furthest
I had ever been from home for you
Saved for 3 months every dollar too
Landed and didn't even last until day 2

We Found Love in one night
Where you couldn't see an end
Skateboards and dealers, 
Rum in mugs later smashed in unknown car parks
Down the western line
And into the rabbit hole for the first time

Traveling down the same highway every night
Same soundtrack of our lives was fine
Found stories of Brooklyn in these songs
We wanted to be so much like them 
That we even went to the places she sung about
And ended up killing each other, like she also sung about 

You craved a love as deep as the ocean
But puddles are oceans 
To those who have only seen puddles
And not real oceans
Prayed for the flood,
And then the heavens did open
My mouth to tell you
I wish we had never even spoken 
No one's ever touched you with the real love
But you can keeping hopin'

Rebirth // 重生

What I'm Wearing:
Military Bulldog Harness (Army of Men)
Underwear (Calvin Klein)
Dog Tag (White Party Exclusive VIP Souvenir)
Skull Bandana Arm Buff (Custom)

You can be reborn over and over and over again until you find that part of you that is the best you that you can be, so I encourage everyone to be that way. Birth is not finite or temporal, it is infinite.


When the idea of who you are gets out into the world, and people really like it, you could not feel any better. Essentially when you gain a little bit of success doing one thing, it can be so uplifting in the beginning that you just want to keep being this one thing. But I encourage you to shapeshift and evolve as much as you want and can. 

A little bit about me is each night before I sleep, I like to look back at my day and think of how I have progressed - even in the smallest way. It's like looking back at yourself; 1 week before the present, 1 month before, 1 year before etc. and seeing your former self as a bit of a loser - not in the way that you are disparaging yourself, but from the perspective that you are now so happy that you have changed and evolved so much since the past - and that progression is what really keeps us happy.

I actually used to get cyclically depressed all the time, and I had no idea why. Then one day, I stepped back and lifted the gaze - coming to realise that the times where I spiralled into unhappiness were periods where I felt like I was not growing in any way. 

Today, I get a lot of flack about having changed the focus away from solely style and fashion and onto my body for attention, but that is not true - my answer is that I'm a fashion blogger who happened to start getting into fitness. At the core of what I always encouraged and hoped for myself, and for you, was not one style or one way of presenting yourself, but a dynamic inner sense of fame that can be as charmeleon-esque as you'd like. 

The truth is, I've changed a lot over the last year. I've delved into worlds and circles where taking pride in the way your body looks is very centre, especially in my travels to Asia and the USA - and it's also a lot of what my friends are into too. I may spend a lot of time at the gym now, but I am just as interested in fashion - I am not just the one thing now - I am both. 

I would have never dreamed of wearing harnesses, like this one from Army of Men, a few months back, but being able to put it on now is the epitome of the freedom license you have to carry yourself with the air of whatever you want to be, and that is what I wanted from day one. The point is that whatever you wear, whether it be the street goth fashion of my early bloggings or now leather harnesses, it should always viscerally make you feel like such a king and such a badass in whatever you're doing that you get that that fiery confidence that means the ultimate you comes out.

Embrace the truest idea of who you want to be right now and in the future, and understand that change is part of that. Hold it close to your heart that you don't let anyone else's, and even your own, idea of who you are stop you from growing.  

Punk Prince

What I'm wearing:
Mask (Custom)
Ring (Gucci)
Trunks (Calvin Klein)

"Take your broken heart, turn it into art"

-punk pʌŋk/ n. a worthless person (often used as a general term of abuse)
-prince prɪns/ n. the son of a monarchic ruler


I was 16 at the time, and a song called "Dance in the Dark" came out and hit me. The tune followed the narrative of an insecure protagonist who could only express themselves raw, exposed and passionate under the guise of darkness where they could hide for fear that those around (and even close) to them would judge them in the light. So resonating with the story of the song, and how it made me feel like my lonely childhood condition was somehow understood - I was hellbent on recreating the Philip Treacy facepiece from the song's single cover. Two weeks, and a lot of bleeding fingers later, I had created my first custom piece. I got off so hard from this creative project ... yet had no courage to show anyone ever ...

Fast forward 7 years to 23 and I'm a dramatically different boy ... now man? I really appreciate my platform now to be creative, to be able to work with brands and for people to care about what goes in my mind - you are validation for me. I found the mask hidden somewhere and all those feelings came rushing back...

Not that I'm on the level of the people I am about to mention, but people I look(ed) up to mentioned how they were outcasts and part of the weird group or didn't even have any friends in highschool: Freddie Mercury, Lady Gaga or Emma Watson ... who are now the cool kids these days and that is my hope for you.

They ran a longitudinal study analysing high school "coolness" with success later in life. Interestingly, they found that those who were deemed popular in highschool were more negatively correlated to success, and that those deemed uncool during these years were statistically more successful. This is not to say that if you were popular, you won't be successful, but more so that if you didn't feel so good in high school, your opportunities are still there and the odds are in fact stacked in your favour. Some conclusions drawn were that more emotionally aggressive people could easily be more popular in highschool, however those who had high EQ had success remain dormant for them until their adult life. 

Now I love expressing my raw passion, especially through dance and sexuality (which was the intention for this photo series). The mask means something dramatically different to me now and is a symbol of how long I've come ... Punk Prince still loves to Dance in the Dark in such a different way. 

Dancing Star

What I'm Wearing
Badged Denim Jacket (Guess)
Dark Denim Jeans (Industrie)

One must still have chaos in oneself to be able to give birth to a dancing star. The time of the most despicable man is coming, he that is no longer able to despise himself ...


I went away for a while. Did a little thinking. Did a little traveling. Saw parts of the world I always wanted to see. Got a new job. Graduated. Met a few crazy people. Did more crazy things. All this was a culmination of a moment I had when I was 19. I was so gravely unhappy with who I was and where I was heading. There was literally nothing about myself I liked, nothing I did that I really enjoyed - just some inner chaos I wanted to rid myself of. A quarter life crisis I called it. So I embarked on a journey to remove that inner chaos.

I was scared of almost everything ... So I took a sheet of paper, wrote 23 on it and then listed all the things I wanted to accomplish in 4 years. Sprawled on it were personals goals that I would make meaningful connection with others, have a successful and fulfilling career, get fit and find creative outlets. Accomplishment should do it I thought.

Fashion was part of that journey, and when I started blogging, I wanted to position myself as the lens to highlight the fashion, as if I was the hanger. My love for fashion orbited around my appreciation of the madness of designers and finesse of manufacturers ... but the clothes were never about the person in them. I jumped from style to style, got bored eventually, and forgot why I fell in love with fashion in the first place ... and that is the way it made it feel when I walked into a party and I didn't have the confidence to speak to anyone, but I knew I had my denim jacket with me so it didn't fucking matter what they thought.

Now I've hit 23, I've ticked off almost everything on that list and everyone says I've changed, and I have, but somehow, I feel exactly the same on the inside. I was waiting for that climactic moment in any bildungsroman when the protagonist suddenly comes to some kind of great epiphany that drives them to some eternal life path ... but it never came.

All these things I had done, all these people I had met, all these places I had seen, and I somehow still felt that deep dark insatiable chaos inside and I began to realise it was always a part of me and had driven me to the most exciting places in my life. This was not a chaos of sadness, but one of purposeful discontentment, one of always wanting to find more, a chaos of understanding possibility.

Now, I relish the chaos, because that is life as I knew it and I love what it means for me.

Keeping Your Time

You're moments away from your next great idea, and seconds away from your next great moment ...

Some time after initially discovering the idea of a sense of style through fashion, we all begin to realise less is more. This reason, amongst many others is why I love Daniel Wellington. 

Use "jayswayin" to receive 15% off when purchasing a watch at www.danielwellington.com. In addition to this, you get a free nylon strap if you purchase from the classic or classy collection up to the 15th of September. 
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