Punk Prince

January 14, 2017






What I'm wearing:
Mask (Custom)
Ring (Gucci)
Trunks (Calvin Klein)


"Take your broken heart, turn it into art"

-punk pʌŋk/ n. a worthless person (often used as a general term of abuse)
-prince prɪns/ n. the son of a monarchic ruler

***

I was 16 at the time, and a song called "Dance in the Dark" came out and hit me. The tune followed the narrative of an insecure protagonist who could only express themselves raw, exposed and passionate under the guise of darkness where they could hide for fear that those around (and even close) to them would judge them in the light. So resonating with the story of the song, and how it made me feel like my lonely childhood condition was somehow understood - I was hellbent on recreating the Philip Treacy facepiece from the song's single cover. Two weeks, and a lot of bleeding fingers later, I had created my first custom piece. I got off so hard from this creative project ... yet had no courage to show anyone ever ...

Fast forward 7 years to 23 and I'm a dramatically different boy ... now man? I really appreciate my platform now to be creative, to be able to work with brands and for people to care about what goes in my mind - you are validation for me. I found the mask hidden somewhere and all those feelings came rushing back...

Not that I'm on the level of the people I am about to mention, but people I look(ed) up to mentioned how they were outcasts and part of the weird group or didn't even have any friends in highschool: Freddie Mercury, Lady Gaga or Emma Watson ... who are now the cool kids these days and that is my hope for you.

They ran a longitudinal study analysing high school "coolness" with success later in life. Interestingly, they found that those who were deemed popular in highschool were more negatively correlated to success, and that those deemed uncool during these years were statistically more successful. This is not to say that if you were popular, you won't be successful, but more so that if you didn't feel so good in high school, your opportunities are still there and the odds are in fact stacked in your favour. Some conclusions drawn were that more emotionally aggressive people could easily be more popular in highschool, however those who had high EQ had success remain dormant for them until their adult life. 

Now I love expressing my raw passion, especially through dance and sexuality (which was the intention for this photo series). The mask means something dramatically different to me now and is a symbol of how long I've come ... Punk Prince still loves to Dance in the Dark in such a different way. 

Dancing Star

December 09, 2016


What I'm Wearing
Badged Denim Jacket (Guess)
Dark Denim Jeans (Industrie)





One must still have chaos in oneself to be able to give birth to a dancing star. The time of the most despicable man is coming, he that is no longer able to despise himself ...

***

I went away for a while. Did a little thinking. Did a little traveling. Saw parts of the world I always wanted to see. Got a new job. Graduated. Met a few crazy people. Did more crazy things. All this was a culmination of a moment I had when I was 19. I was so gravely unhappy with who I was and where I was heading. There was literally nothing about myself I liked, nothing I did that I really enjoyed - just some inner chaos I wanted to rid myself of. A quarter life crisis I called it. So I embarked on a journey to remove that inner chaos.

I was scared of almost everything ... So I took a sheet of paper, wrote 23 on it and then listed all the things I wanted to accomplish in 4 years. Sprawled on it were personals goals that I would make meaningful connection with others, have a successful and fulfilling career, get fit and find creative outlets. Accomplishment should do it I thought.

Fashion was part of that journey, and when I started blogging, I wanted to position myself as the lens to highlight the fashion, as if I was the hanger. My love for fashion orbited around my appreciation of the madness of designers and finesse of manufacturers ... but the clothes were never about the person in them. I jumped from style to style, got bored eventually, and forgot why I fell in love with fashion in the first place ... and that is the way it made it feel when I walked into a party and I didn't have the confidence to speak to anyone, but I knew I had my denim jacket with me so it didn't fucking matter what they thought.

Now I've hit 23, I've ticked off almost everything on that list and everyone says I've changed, and I have, but somehow, I feel exactly the same on the inside. I was waiting for that climactic moment in any bildungsroman when the protagonist suddenly comes to some kind of great epiphany that drives them to some eternal life path ... but it never came.

All these things I had done, all these people I had met, all these places I had seen, and I somehow still felt that deep dark insatiable chaos inside and I began to realise it was always a part of me and had driven me to the most exciting places in my life. This was not a chaos of sadness, but one of purposeful discontentment, one of always wanting to find more, a chaos of understanding possibility.

Now, I relish the chaos, because that is life as I knew it and I love what it means for me.

Keeping Your Time

September 05, 2016


You're moments away from your next great idea, and seconds away from your next great moment ...

Some time after initially discovering the idea of a sense of style through fashion, we all begin to realise less is more. This reason, amongst many others is why I love Daniel Wellington. 

Use "jayswayin" to receive 15% off when purchasing a watch at www.danielwellington.com. In addition to this, you get a free nylon strap if you purchase from the classic or classy collection up to the 15th of September. 

Winter Days

December 16, 2015

Candids from a Winter Day

Spectre

July 21, 2015

Art is pain and pain is the art in which we find ourselves...

I've always been told that that in a dialectic of any visual form of art, whether it be film, photography, fashion or any other, that each and every element of the composition of each frame is an intentional element from the creator. Since delving into photography and understanding the nature of the shot, which is very contingent on the unpredictable environment, I have learned that this is most probably not true in all cases. Wind, rain, crowds and eye bags are just a few things that can go wrong...

However, everything about this shoot seemed to work seamlessly, including the use of a claymore which I borrowed from one of my colleagues. Many friends and peers commented that it was an absurd and unnecessary prop, but each time they had done this, I rebut them in saying:

Because the composition of a photograph is supposedly intentional
We are meant to look for figurative meaning
That is why a picture is worth a thousand words

R.M. Drake comments 
Art is pain and pain is art in which we find ourselves

Well for the longest time, I felt this
And the need to expel it in a creative repository
This was fashion and photography and blogging
But what has always been visible has been my guard

Or as Donatella Versace puts it
Fashion is a weapon that you can use when you need it

That's why I find it so absurd that people think it's absurd
That I have a sword in my picture
For it's always been there. 
This is just a spectre of my real fashion self.

 
Outfit Details
Black Cape (Zara)
Oversized Black Tee (Zara)
Drop Crotch Pants (Zara)
Socks (Ralph Lauren)
Khaki Army Boots (Windsor Smith)
Chrome Bracelet (Urban Outfitters)

Hippie State of Mind

June 23, 2015

Hippie State of Mind

I'm not sure if you've noticed but I've been a bit less active lately. Here is why...

***

In a recent media article, they interviewed a 100 year old lady who had endured a miscarriage, sexual, emotional and physical abuse by the hands of her long time husband for 27 years - and they asked her - what is the secret to life? She answered it simply and happily:


"Life is about riding the highs and the lows"

Communal braiding and floral arrangements in one's hair. Hydroponic weed, peace tattoos, singing Kumbuya in grassy circles and psychedelic rainbow euphoria. That is NOT the hippie that I'm talking about. Well maybe the rainbow part. Anyway, if you've read my About Me, you would have gotten an understanding of who I was as a person.

And in February of this year, I was on the very cusp of the lowest low my life had ever fallen to. I had spent years and years, with no friends and people that made fun of me while I was trying to hide parts of myself from everyone. I remember lying in bed many nights crying thinking that no one would ever want me and my only dream I held onto while growing up alone was professional success and having even a few people acknowledge me.

This February, after finally getting on a high from moving on from achieving many great things, I had an existential crisis in which everything I had ever worked toward in my life and each and every struggle I endured, even through loneliness, gave me absolutely no meaning to my life. The things I chased were all vain, hollow and a chasing of the wind …

Thus came the worst two months of my life...

However…

On a recent weekend, I had a complete change of viewpoint about life. It wasn't something said, or even a direct action but a friend's attitude that somehow gave me meaning to my life. To live a life of love, spreading love and creating love. 

In my 22 years living, I really can agree with that 100 year old, it is a series of riding the ups and the downs - knowing that it is part of the destiny of being human.

And an even more integral part of being human is relating to one another. I found that my friends helped me through this depression. Did you know that when you move your hands toward yourself in the motion of a hug, your brain releases endorphins that makes you happy and that when you gesture in the motion of pushing something away, your brain's Modula Oblongata raises feelings of tension. We are PHYSIOLOGICALLY WIRED TO LOVE! 

And thus, I think my hollowness began to fill in with the new doctrine of love. I want to take each day as a blessing as it comes and enjoy the unexpected journey that is life - every single day, there is something to work toward and an adventure and opportunities to love. Many people say, they've never met a happy rich person. This is just a saying but my understanding of this is that the rich don't appreciate the small things. The key to happiness is contentment in any situation and to enjoy even the smallest pleasures life has to offer, which for me are weird things like staring out bus windows and drawing a story about the people you see on the city streets. It's small things like that. 

Life is about creating things in love. If you insert this idea into any situation, it is immediately given purpose and direction. Whether it is your friends, family, lover, yourself, what you do, loving the city you live in or even clouds in the sky or a summer breeze. None of this 30-70 bullshit. I believe in loving to my very bones. Unrequited or unequal love between people is as legitimate love as mutual love, just because the other does not love you back as much, doesn't take from the value of your own love that comes out of yourself. So here's to a life of loving each other, and encouraging one another to live in love, and also to love life itself - high and lows of each and every day inclusive.

 I call it a hippie state of mind. 
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