- Tuesday, December 03, 2019
- 0 Comments
“I think everybody should get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of so they can see that it's not the answer” – Jim Carrey
You live in a society that puts fame, success and fortune on a pedestal like no other, but why? Individualism! You are told from young that you are set apart because of your uniqueness and individuality, and because of this you will rise above the masses. Then you start to set expectations for a special destiny, for yourself and your society members, and anything short of this destiny results in self criticism, self loathing and existential depression - does this sound familiar?
On a treacherously windy day in Seoul, I continued to lament over this, and it was something I had written about previously. In short, when you’re 15, you never think you’ll actually get to 25, but eventually we do. It may be a different age for you, but there is ultimately a point in time where we all reckon with the idea that we cannot stop ourselves from ageing. The biggest thing is that you realise you now have a finite number of days to achieve everything you want. In your youth, you feel immortal but you lose that in adulthood.
Amidst my bad mood and Seoul's equally grey Changseong-dong district, a yellow sunflower bursting out of the cement metropolis cured me of this depression – and I’d like to share the lesson it taught me.
On a treacherously windy day in Seoul, I continued to lament over this, and it was something I had written about previously. In short, when you’re 15, you never think you’ll actually get to 25, but eventually we do. It may be a different age for you, but there is ultimately a point in time where we all reckon with the idea that we cannot stop ourselves from ageing. The biggest thing is that you realise you now have a finite number of days to achieve everything you want. In your youth, you feel immortal but you lose that in adulthood.
Amidst my bad mood and Seoul's equally grey Changseong-dong district, a yellow sunflower bursting out of the cement metropolis cured me of this depression – and I’d like to share the lesson it taught me.
Growing
up, flowers were so pointless to me and I never understood people’s love for them.
They were so ephemeral; perhaps dead tomorrow or at least next season. But on
this certain occasion, the sight of sunflowers in full bloom stirred my
mind, somehow reminding me of my mother who sat on the opposite end of the flower
appreciation spectrum.
My
mother told me her dream was to own her own flower store, but raising three
kids and working almost full time, she never had the chance. Some of my fondest
memories growing up was of myself curiously watching her carefully nurture and
prime her favorite orchids, and times when she created intricate flower
arrangements for Sunday service.
But being the wretched child that I was, I also remember running through our garden with my
twin brother, slashing down all plant life in my path. And that time I once ran over
her flower garden (accidentally) with my car during university – she was livid!
That
felt so long ago … and again I thought of my depleting time and lost childhood … but for the first time
in this lament, I felt a gentle and humble appreciation of the flower in front
of me.
When you feel like you have forever, then today doesn't matter. But the sunflower’s defiant full bloom in Seoul’s ubiquitous concrete became a mirror, reflecting on myself my own mortality in all its ephemeral glory. It felt so beautiful to me because I understood that it was of no certainty but destiny that I chanced these flowers in full bloom.
When you feel like you have forever, then today doesn't matter. But the sunflower’s defiant full bloom in Seoul’s ubiquitous concrete became a mirror, reflecting on myself my own mortality in all its ephemeral glory. It felt so beautiful to me because I understood that it was of no certainty but destiny that I chanced these flowers in full bloom.
And then it struck me. Today, we live in a society that tells us we need to achieve more and more faster in order to feel fulfilled. Modern day individualism preaches that an individual and their achievements are everything, and everyone is capable of living a special destiny. So if we do not live this way then we are a failure. That’s why overnight success of coveted. Fame and social media worsen the need for this with the illusion of fulfillment. To be ordinary is regarded as a curse.
But
in fact, the immensely successful Jim Carrey states: “I think everybody should
get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of so they can see that
it's not the answer.” Have you ever wondered how it's possible that some of the
richest and most successful people are often the unhappiest, and some of the
most joyful spirits can be happy while living on what we in the Western world would
consider not-enough-pocket-change? Sad stories like Avicii and Whitney Houston come to mind.
The
real cure is not a complete rejection of trying to achieve more, but to not forget the appreciation of the good and ordinary life as well as the quiet heroism
of the everyday.
Individualism is a construct, and your list of achievements over time does not denote whether you are fulfilled or a failure. How many times have we seen rich, famous and successful people exude sadness, depression and/or sometimes commit suicide? – perhaps and unfortunately it is because they reached society's end goal to realize it was all a lie?
Individualism is a construct, and your list of achievements over time does not denote whether you are fulfilled or a failure. How many times have we seen rich, famous and successful people exude sadness, depression and/or sometimes commit suicide? – perhaps and unfortunately it is because they reached society's end goal to realize it was all a lie?
Individualism as an end, instead of a means, is a lie. Affluence and perceived success, can be a means to an end - an end that concerns purpose and non-conditional gratitude for just the very moment you have. Relish
every second you have with the simple possibility that it contains and the destiny of the opportunity its giving you.
The beauty of life is in its fleetingness. The glory of a moment is in the fact that it doesn't last forever. And the majesty of a flower stems from the beauty of its architecture, an architecture that is all the more precious because it stands but for a moment. Just like us, and we cannot change that, but every second we’re in full bloom is divine and cosmic opportunity, potential and glory.
The beauty of life is in its fleetingness. The glory of a moment is in the fact that it doesn't last forever. And the majesty of a flower stems from the beauty of its architecture, an architecture that is all the more precious because it stands but for a moment. Just like us, and we cannot change that, but every second we’re in full bloom is divine and cosmic opportunity, potential and glory.
What I'm Wearing
Striped oversized windbreaker (Maniamass)
Yellow tight-fit batpig tee (Groove Rhyme)
Indigo Jeans (G-Star)
Black Military Boots (Palladium)
- Tuesday, May 08, 2018
- 15 Comments
#UnderPressure
I've been feeling some red hot pressure lately and I've definitely been burnt. It's an unusual impending type of urgency you may have felt too - and I'm not sure if we put it on ourselves or if others are laying it on us.
You know, in your early 20s and before, you have this free pass on everything. Sure, it's definitely okay to be unsure about your career as you are working those transitional stepping-stone type of jobs. It's definitely okay to be a bit of a bimbo and not really to have a serious opinion about the world - you're allowed not have a complex view on the socio-political milieu you exist in. Turning up to dinner looking kind've daggy is also okay. And "oh you're such a baby" is such a common novelty of introductory conversations.
But for me, just after turning 25, it's like someone takes the rose-coloured lenses off, snatches away your free pass and increasingly turns up the heat as you encroach into the zone of certain adulthood.
On a work trip to Europe recently, feelings from my youth came back again - inadequacy, uncertainty and shame. Like never before, I felt the greater need to shirtfront myself to others.
I wanted to spend more time and money and effort looking more polished and refined. I loved shopping before, but my north star was always what I thought looked cool or cute and was never the need to just exude value. And when gained, this affluence on show felt like nothing in conversations and small talk where I felt like I was dodging social mines and tightropes as I needed to incline the dialogue toward something that would convey or imply my education, intelligence and adult-worth.
A random thought that I had was that when our bodies and our faces age, we somehow feel more invisible right? So do we place possessions, affluence and power as economic capital in lieu of lost coolness and youth? (can anyone older vouch for this?!) This need to display outward tokens of success started to take me over.
Yet ultimately, there was no line I crossed between 24 and 25 that meant my youth had been lost and that I suddenly had to have all this success and trajectory to replace it. So if no one really draws this line between 24 and 25, and it was merely a few days difference but my perspective had completely changed - then this pressure had to be from me, my craziness and incessant need to please others.
And someone close to me reminded my that we are all on our own timelines, and what we deem as valuable in another is eclectically different. So someone might find it more valuable to take a few years off and travel instead of launching into your career in your early 20s, even though the latter may seem more successful and affluent, one decides the own value of their life choices if they truly own them.
And so I remind myself again to not let this pressure overcome me with feelings of sadness and shame like before, rather, I am looking to find the right balance between being overly self critical about my accomplishments and letting this push me to strive for higher highs on my own timeline. But even so, in my own successes, still being humble enough to be human with anyone - you cannot be a human if you're always trying to be a trophy.
It is also a reminder for me to be respectful of other people's timelines and sovereignty over their own life trajectory. And on the opposite end, when you see someone who seems to have accomplished more than you, be mad at yourself for a damn second, and then turn that rage into fuel.
Have you felt this mid 20s pressure before?
You know, in your early 20s and before, you have this free pass on everything. Sure, it's definitely okay to be unsure about your career as you are working those transitional stepping-stone type of jobs. It's definitely okay to be a bit of a bimbo and not really to have a serious opinion about the world - you're allowed not have a complex view on the socio-political milieu you exist in. Turning up to dinner looking kind've daggy is also okay. And "oh you're such a baby" is such a common novelty of introductory conversations.
***
What I'm Wearing
Parachute Pants (Daniel Patrick)
Gold Striped Windbreaker (Stone Island)
Black Military Boots (Palladium)
Vaporwave Hat (Vapor95)
Bum Bag (The Idle Man)
The amalgam of the sport luxe stripe with head-to-toe uniform is one of the 'it' streetwear looks right now. Whether you exude full-body baggy designer gaudiness a la Billie Eilish, or fabulousness in a romper stomper, colour and/or print coordinated from head-to-toe makes for a striking outfit for this season.
***
But for me, just after turning 25, it's like someone takes the rose-coloured lenses off, snatches away your free pass and increasingly turns up the heat as you encroach into the zone of certain adulthood.
On a work trip to Europe recently, feelings from my youth came back again - inadequacy, uncertainty and shame. Like never before, I felt the greater need to shirtfront myself to others.
I wanted to spend more time and money and effort looking more polished and refined. I loved shopping before, but my north star was always what I thought looked cool or cute and was never the need to just exude value. And when gained, this affluence on show felt like nothing in conversations and small talk where I felt like I was dodging social mines and tightropes as I needed to incline the dialogue toward something that would convey or imply my education, intelligence and adult-worth.
A random thought that I had was that when our bodies and our faces age, we somehow feel more invisible right? So do we place possessions, affluence and power as economic capital in lieu of lost coolness and youth? (can anyone older vouch for this?!) This need to display outward tokens of success started to take me over.
Yet ultimately, there was no line I crossed between 24 and 25 that meant my youth had been lost and that I suddenly had to have all this success and trajectory to replace it. So if no one really draws this line between 24 and 25, and it was merely a few days difference but my perspective had completely changed - then this pressure had to be from me, my craziness and incessant need to please others.
And someone close to me reminded my that we are all on our own timelines, and what we deem as valuable in another is eclectically different. So someone might find it more valuable to take a few years off and travel instead of launching into your career in your early 20s, even though the latter may seem more successful and affluent, one decides the own value of their life choices if they truly own them.
And so I remind myself again to not let this pressure overcome me with feelings of sadness and shame like before, rather, I am looking to find the right balance between being overly self critical about my accomplishments and letting this push me to strive for higher highs on my own timeline. But even so, in my own successes, still being humble enough to be human with anyone - you cannot be a human if you're always trying to be a trophy.
It is also a reminder for me to be respectful of other people's timelines and sovereignty over their own life trajectory. And on the opposite end, when you see someone who seems to have accomplished more than you, be mad at yourself for a damn second, and then turn that rage into fuel.
Have you felt this mid 20s pressure before?
And just cos I miss Bowie
- Tuesday, March 27, 2018
- 5 Comments
I want to help us get to the bottom of our current obsession with stylised throwbacks to the late 20th century - with our faded color tone filters, dad jeans and a life interpreted through the lens of the long lost analog era. Just a few years ago, it was quite the contrary - in the late 2000s and early 2010s, culture portrayed modern life through a frame of excess and an ostensibly more hyper realist perspective - it was the age of HD clear music videos, photos and CGI movies with an oozing opulence that was so prevalent in fashion and pop culture ...
***
What I'm Wearing
Vintage Dad Jeans (The Idle Man)
Navy Windbreaker (The Idle Man)
Fila Tee (sourced from The Idle Man)
The Idle Man, a menswear based retailer, catering to the style conscious man. Hosting brands such as Champion, Farah and Dickies, The Idle Man is a go-to destination for men. Alongside the online shop, The Idle Man Manual is a blog dedicated to offering style advice as well as stories and guides about music, grooming and lifestyle.
Use JONO10 at checkout to receive 10% off their A/W Collection.
***
... Fast forward to today and it's like we're ironically trying to press the rewind button on technology (and ourselves..?) to turn back the film back to the days of the VCR. Now, when you look at the history of the movement of social currents, art and culture, latter ideologies as trends often come as a response to a former wave. Like Minimalism was a response to Abstract Expressionism and the hippie movement a rebuttal of 1960s institutionalization and war.
So when you place the current obsession with the analog vis-a-vis the former wave of opulence and hyper-realism, the relativity of these ideas on the spectrum may explain the birth of the obsession with the past. For with hyper-realism, we experienced such real magnification of our modern lives with all its consumerism, technology and excess, that perhaps it made us realise that postmodern 21st century living was not all it was cut out to be. With the omniscient access to information, the prevalence of the screen and the indexing of human relationships and even humans themselves through social media, our knee-jerk reaction was to jump headstrong back in the opposite direction, where we could - in fashion, music and art.
Or even so that for all the hyper-realistic immortalisation of our selves and our experiences in pictures and moving pictures, we could still never hold onto moments. Humans have a tendency to long for what they can't have or what's been lost, and in this way, we will always romanticise the past. That is why dressing like I'm from the 1990s is so much more than a purely aesthetic choice. It represents an innate obsession with the past in a longing for a time for greater connection to one another with more palpable realness, and a yearning for simpler human pleasures in an altogether more complicated digital world. And these ideas are pushed into the forefront as the 1990s kids of today are bursting into adulthood as cultural leaders.
What about you? Is nostalgia your thing?
***
A little extra if you're interested. Perfectly styled Digital 1990s:
- Tuesday, October 24, 2017
- 2 Comments
On Kicks and Energies
ACRONYM'S 2nd collaboration with Nike hits all the notes of the absolute sneaker I need in my closet. I have to admit, I used to buy a lot of sneakers, but barely wore them more than a few times due to the sheer saturation of the same styles in the market - we are all searching for the eye catching pair that have some semblance of conventional style and architecture, but are not donned by every second sneakerhead.That is why this pair stands out, boasting superlative matchability and versatility, it is also a pair you will not find commonly and looks different dependent on stylistic angling.
- Wednesday, August 30, 2017
- 0 Comments
"Take your broken heart, turn it into art"
-punk pʌŋk/ n. a worthless person (often used as a general term of abuse)
-prince prɪns/ n. the son of a monarchic ruler
***
- Thursday, May 04, 2017
- 6 Comments
Zenosyne: The sense that time is going faster.
It's actually just after your born that life flashes before your eyes - entire eons lived in those first few moments. As a kid you run around so fast, the world around you seems to stand still. A summer vacation can stretch on for an eternity. With each birthday we circle back and cross the same point around the sun. We wish each other 'many happy returns.' But soon you feel the circle begin to tighten, and you realize it's a spiral, and you're already halfway through.
***
When we are young and first come out into the adult world, we can meet those often a lot older than us, and we are dumbfounded at anyone who's default state of mind of cynicism and jadedness. But that is because we are our black and white selves then. We begin to lose our black and white selves more and more after being caught up, again and again, waist deep in the quagmire I call the struggles of the human condition.
If you are unfortunate enough to have history repeat itself, the black and white in us starts to diffuse into one another. Each and every time, the polarities which we once allow in our lives, whether good or bad, come a little closer to the centre, until the adventures we were once brave enough to go after are left in a a murky halfway space that I call the inbetween grey.
I found myself at a weird cross road recently - one that I think we all face. I noticed a recurring pattern in my life - this was the repeated pushing away of good people in my life. So scared of the black, that I was never willing to try open myself to the white in my life. So scared of the bad people I had encountered that I was never willing to give the good a chance.
But I have also become gravely more aware of mortality each and every day. And then I missed how brave I used to be. I felt the circle tightening, finding myself wanting to come back around again. I was becoming the very image of who we did not want to be when we first came out into the world.
Wongfu once said that "death was not what saddened us the most, but the fact that we had never felt like we had fallen in love. We would never ever have had those emotions of being hurt and being held. Teaching us that one of the greatest gifts we have in a being alive is give, receive and even lose love. What a waste, why waste this life not loving?" And I expect to see none in your in the grayscale, not now, and not years from now ...
***
Checkout the Dictionary of Obscure Sorrow's visual representation of Zenosyne below. I am always speechless and shook after watching this:
What I'm Wearing
-I Love Ugly White Collarless longline Shirt
-Industrie Shredded Black Shorts
-Burberry Gun Metal Watch
-Reebok Classic White High Top Kicks
- Friday, March 31, 2017
- 0 Comments
You're moments away from your next great idea, and seconds away from your next great moment ...
- Monday, September 05, 2016
- 0 Comments
Summer is closing...
And what a summer it's been. I finished my 4th year of university. I partied too hard and spent way too much time at the beach. I finished my work with Australia's biggest online retailer (ASOS) and I started two new internships with Topman and Microsoft. I quit my job selling suits and Myer and spent many days with new friends in undiscovered places in Sydney.
One of these spots was the gorgeous La Perouse in the south of Sydney City. If you've followed my fashion, you know I've got quite the obsession with heavy urban streetwear. I don't know if I'm getting bored with it, or if I'm changing but I've been interested in trying looks that stray away from this niche.
And, it is probably the latter. One of the greatest things I learned over this summer is the efficiency of inefficiency. I worked 3 jobs at a time, with full time university, and all my spare time went into guitar, blogging and gym. I would come home with the feeling of bricks tied to my head, and as a result I did not enjoy or even want to do the things I had enjoyed so me.
So this look encapsulates one feeling. Relaxation.
Full outfit details below.
What I'm wearing
Straw Hat (H&M)
Linen Shirt (Zara)
Linen Pants (Zara)
Brown Roman Sandals (Witchery Men)
Blueface Silver Watch (Fossil)
- Tuesday, February 17, 2015
- 0 Comments
An indication of the new direction I want to take with fashion. I remember it was a sunny LA afternoon when I was inspired to create this blog. Somewhere down town, a troop of gentlemen dressed in black cape hoodies layered under leather jackets and accompanying ripped charcoal jeans. Their attitude and nerve struck me with such force, I began to reflect on my own image, my own direction and how I put myself out into the world. The nerve they had still gets me...
Thus began my obsession with urban street wear as has been the focus of almost all my looks. I don't know if it's simply me wanting to look more mature (not that heavy street wear is immature), or that its simply me exploring me peripheries.
I also have begun working for Topman in a recent internship as well as Microsoft and am looking fashion that is more appropriate for the corporate sphere. This look capitalises on my obsession with beige and blue. I picked up these gorgeous Cole Haans from a boutique in Soho, New York and I thought the orange lining matched perfectly with a pair of socks I had picked up in LA.
My current fascination is collarless button ups is also included in this look. It gives the overall outfit a sleek outlook.
What I'm wearing:
Blue Collar-less Button Up (Zara)
Cropped Beige Chinos (Uniqlo)
Orange/Blue Anchor Print Socks (Urban Outfitters)
Brown Lunar Grands (Cole Haan)
Silver Blue Face Watch (Fossil)
Beige Carry Bag (Cedar Wood State)
- Thursday, January 29, 2015
- 0 Comments
